JUST DO IT

07.06.04


I read Christina’s comment on sexuality and I find it impossible not to make even a slight comment about it. As I understand things, I figure out that there is a lot of misinformation regarding the sexuality of people with a disability. If I have to speak thoroughly about everything I have heard on that issue, I will have to drop a bomb over the weblog so as to challenge you. It is too early to do that. I will only tell you one thing. There are many people who combine disability with sexual incompetence or with the lack of erotic mood. As happens with other forms of prejudice, this one finds its source in the insufficient or wrong information on the subject. It is obvious that each of us, for our part, has to shed some light over this so dark case.

For this reason, it is truly essential to work together, in order to provide those interested in learning more about things they don’t know with reliable information. Not because we absolutely have to change the minds of some people. Anyhow, this can’t happen from one day to the other. When we decide to talk, even when dealing with taboo-subjects, we do so to defend ourselves. This is another way of making a case and exercising policy, aiming at dragging ourselves out of our cave.

It hasn’t been more than a year since I was asked to do a story relevant to that matter on behalf of the NHT (New Hellenic Television). I was very glad to have taken that chance, even though I think that it was kind of awkward to start with such a story. I don’t mean that sexuality is a less important issue, not at all. It is just a subject that surprises those who don’t have the slightest idea on the people who are around them and have mobility or other kinds of problems.

When you do not have more than two and a half minutes of television time, you don’t manage to say much, unless you have a specific plan in which you can integrate the opinions-statements of all those people who finally manage to pass the message that you are the first to have in mind.

On the one hand, it is a double-edged sword to work on such a serious thing. You are expected to be ready to defend the right to love, stressing the fact that the sexual life of people with a disability should not be treated as a problem. On the other hand, though, if you start talking too much about it, you are the one to risk treating it as a problem indeed. After all, sex is not something to talk about but something to do.

What I wanted from the very first moment was to send a positive message through a story like that – a positive answer to those who wonder whether they are entitled or able to have a normal life with their partners, regardless of the problems they might be facing. I should approach this from different points of view; the psychological-social, the medical and the personal one.
For the first one (psychological-social), I had to interview Thanos Askitis, who referred mostly to the psychological factors that determine our sexual behaviour, always related to how the family helps or not the individual have a healthy opinion of his/her relations with the other sex.

The medical approach was represented by mr. Tassiopoulos, physiatrist and responsible for issues of sexual restoration of the National Institution for the Rehabilitation of the Handicapped. The purpose was to cry this ‘‘YES’’ out loud, thus refuting every incompetence scenario. Even in such cases, science has contributed decisively to the denial of such stereotypes that put disability and incompetence together.

For the end of the story, I addressed my good friend, Sophocles Alepis, who summarized the position of the people with a disability themselves regarding that matter. In his own way he gave a more realistic approach of the whole thing, for he referred to our share of responsibility in everything that happens.

The funniest thing was the editing procedure. We were cutting and rearranging the material for a whole morning, trying to throw away the useless stuff and thus maintain the essence. The result was amazing. The show received dozens of phonecalls from people who wanted to know more. I was asked to undertake the editing of more stories. What I really did not have was time. I had to do most interviews in the morning; but I work in the morning. Moreover, there was no anticipation of any kind of material reward for this journalistic activity. I am too old to work for free, even for a task whose results will do me good anyway.